Weeks 4 and 5: The quick, quick version.

Okay, here are the last two weeks in a nutshell.


Everyone apparently hates Corinne, because she is hyper sexual and doesn't hide it. She is also the "I am not here to make friends" girl.


Nick is letting her stick around b/c if this "journey" actually works and he finds the woman he will marry, Corinne is symbolic of his last hurrah... also, the producers said he had to.


In week four, they went to Nick's "hometown" Milwaukee... except, he is from a suburb of, and they only spent about three total hours anywhere NEAR Milwaukee and even then, they only hit two cool places - and they weren't even the best Milwaukee places. SO DISAPPOINTING.  Nick takes Danielle L on a solo date where they attend a Chris Lane Concert (I have no idea who that is) at the Pabst Theater (one of the cool MKE places they actually hit). She got a rose... no real surprise there. He took Raven to his little sister's soccer game to meet his family and to a roller rink. This leads me to believe Raven will be sticking around for a while. Was it just me, or did Nick seem oddly comfortable on those skates? I think he used to be one of the roller rink employees that would skate around and blow his whistle at you if you were up to any funny business. Those guys took themselves WAY to seriously... I could see Nick being that way in high school. ANYWAY... Raven got the rose. On the group date they spent time on a dairy farm... b/c stereotypes! We are in Wisconsin! Let's pretend to farm!  The only good part about that date was all the cow poo, and all the girls slipping and sliding through it... except Corinne, who refuses to play...which, to the other women is what...strike 8?  The girls really hate her. At one point, Corinne describes herself as corn "you have to peel back the layers but once you do it is all juicy and buttery inside", Jesus, I love this girl. What a lunatic. I have NO idea who got the rose.
The episode ended as the rose ceremony cocktail party was heating up, and Taylor the brain confronted Corinne the sex pot about not having any emotional intelligence. Now, I get what Taylor is trying to do here, which is hike up ratings and make Corinne feel bad about herself...but it is a really nasty side of a woman who I thought HAD MORE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE than that! It was like the pot calling the kettle black... and just as the "fight" was heating up... "Do NOT call me STUPID, TAYLOR!!" - the episode ends.


Episode 5 picked up where we left off... and much like it always happens when the Bachelor has a "cliffhanger"... it leads to literally nothing. The girls stop talking and Nick hands out roses. Going home are... honestly... I have no idea who any of those girls are. Have they been here all season?


The rest of the crew heads to New Orleans. Nick takes Rachel (Go, Marquette! Go! Go! Go! Go!) and they partake in the "wander around the city and take in the culture date". They seem to have a very genuine like for each other and Rachel is a shoe in for the Rose. In fact, I feel like we may be inching ever closer to Rachel as the Bachelorette... she is AWESOME and I think has plenty of personality to carry a season on her own - Much more than quite a few of our past bachelorettes... so I am keeping my fingers crossed, I think she would be perfect... I feel kind of bad that my hopes for her being the bachelorette means that I am sort of hoping for her to get her heartbroken by Nick... so sorry about that Rachel.
There is a group date... they spend the evening in a "haunted" mansion... which, given with New Orleans spiritual culture and history, could have been cool... instead it was just, cheesy. Danielle M got the rose.
In a move surprising to NO ONE, Taylor and Corinne get the dreaded two on one date. They ride a boat down the bayou to the middle of nowhere swamp and learn about voodoo. Corinne takes her time with Nick to tell him all about how Taylor is mean. Taylor can't really contradict Corinne's story to Nick... b/c well... it's true. So Nick gives Corinne the rose, and he and Corinne leave Taylor behind in the swamp with the voodoo priestesses. As Nick and Corinne enjoy a dinner alone, Taylor has allowed the priestesses to perform a voodoo ritual on her and she is marching up the stairs to Nick's date to tell him all the things she thinks he still needs to hear.... AND fade to black.


Join us next time, as Nick must face Taylor and the voodoo magic.


Honestly, I like Nick. I REALLY appreciate that he knows the appropriate times to use "I" and "me" in a sentence... but all this cliff hanger stuff... it's getting old. Particularly b/c NOTHING EVER HAPPENS after the cliff hanger. Fingers crossed for this week!


Enjoy!!